On Simple Pleasures and Existential Crises

First, a quick note about yesterday. Fin and I went to a new (for her) grocery store. I had never noticed, but they have those little car carts and she flipped out! She thought it was the best thing. Every time I would push the cart, she would "get up on the wheel" and take the corners in the produce aisle like a champ.


Today, Fin was a real trooper. She had to go get some x-rays done and she sat very still to have her "picture taken" and they got them on the first try. No, nothing is wrong. Her PPD test was positive because she had a TB vaccine in China and those antibodies tend to set it off. She needs the x-ray to be cleared for school. Then, mama had to work late and her babysitter left at 5, so she basically kept herself occupied for another hour-and-a-half and let me work. What a good girl! I sing the praises of toddler adoption!

After a long day (she put the sunglasses on her head herself... I've never done that on her):


After realizing she was home:


Now, on to a little aside for those out there in adoption land. Tonight, I put on a cd that Fin received at her shower. It is a cd of kids songs with her name in it. It is the coolest thing! (By the way, if you don't have friends who own a toy store, I highly recommend you get some.)

At first, she was confused. I think she thought she was being spied on from the cd player. Then, she really freaked out. She has been using her English name more and more, but sometimes she still clings to her Chinese name, "Mian Mian". As she was listening to this cd and the way they repeated "Fin" in the songs, she lay down in the floor and started chanting, "MianMianMianMianMianMian," over and over. I turned off the cd and distracted her with something else, but later went back to it. This time, she was fine... MORE than fine. She was dancing and singing and even repeating some the lyrics.

Sometimes all of the change just hits her and its more than she wants to take on. So, SHE slows things down and reinforces something familiar. She's such a part of me now, like an appendage, and I forget that everything about her life has changed in the past five weeks. Everything about my life changed too, but I had been waiting for it and wanting it. It takes a moment like this to remind me about that.